


Tsukurella

by Rukazaya



Series: [Durarara!!] Non-Shizaya drabbles and one shots [19]
Category: Durarara!!
Genre: Assisted Masturbation, Cinderella what cinderella, Izaya being exasperated, M/M, Smut, Turning human, bath tub, don't mess with shizuo either, fun ensues, trashella more like lol, tsukumoya being a general fuck up, tsukumoya being the trash baby he is
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-26
Updated: 2015-12-26
Packaged: 2018-05-09 13:09:30
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,304
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5541239
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rukazaya/pseuds/Rukazaya
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It’s Christmas and Santa Claus is REAL. Since Tsukumoya has been a good boy, he gets one wish to come true and he asks to be turned into a real human being for 24 hours. But Santa reminds him, when the clock turns midnight, the magic will disappear.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Tsukurella

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Immicolia](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Immicolia/gifts).



  
Event: Durarara Gift Exchange Secret Santa Event fanfic ♥

Title:  Tsukurella  (Tsukumoya x Izaya's Cinderella (loosely based) story)

Pairings:  Orihara Izaya x Tsukumoya Shinichi

Rated: R

Summary: It’s Christmas and Santa Claus is REAL. Since Tsukumoya has been a good boy, he gets one wish to come true and he asks to be turned into a real human being for 24 hours. But Santa reminds him, when the clock turns midnight, the magic will disappear.

 

* * *

 

*Ding dong*

Izaya looked up from his typing furiously into his computer at the sound of the doorbell. It was Christmas Eve and he had told Namie to go home and spend her time with whoever she wanted and he didn’t have anyone booked to meet. And for heaven’s sake, didn’t people realize that businesses were closed on this day, whether or not their wife was cheating on them, it was a national holiday! Weren’t most of them eating their KFC or being merry in front of a hot pot without him?

Groaning, Izaya pushed back his chair to stand and open the door. He was totally prepared to politely turn them away, only to find an unusual pair in front of his door.

Specifically, it was none other than Celty Sturluson, commonly referred to as the legendary Black Rider, holding up the back shirt collar of a young man with medium length silver hair as if he was a cat. A rather very dirty and stinky young man with silver hair but it was hard to tell the length with how matted it was…and he really reeked of trash.

“Uhh…” Izaya was polite enough to not turn his nose away from the sour smell coming from the young man. If he was with Celty, this wasn’t an ordinary visit.

“Ah, that’s him. Yes. Thank you Sturluson-san. Your payment…” The young man seemed to smile, but not quite a smile, it was as if ‘smiling’ was unnatural thing for him to do as he tried to dig into his pockets.

Celty let go of the shirt, making the young man almost stumble into Izaya, except the informant smoothly avoided the possible collateral damage to his expensive custom-made clothes. Izaya watched as the young man stumble and barely hold onto the door frame as if he wasn’t good on his feet. Peculiar…

[No need. I expect the payment tomorrow through wire transit as usual.] Celty quickly typed and flashed the PDA in front of both of them. The young man nodded and waved.

“Ah, wait, Celty?!” Izaya called out when Celty had already turned to leave. Izaya sighed as he turned back to face his possible client.

“Alright…sir. I’m not sure why you’re here but…” Izaya wasn’t sure how to say any more politely to ‘go home before you ruin my floors with the smell of piss’ but the young man just chuckled.

“You don’t recognize me, Orihara. Then again, that’s expected of you since we’ve never met face to face.”

“....” Izaya paused. The way he spoke…that mannerism and how those unnerving eyes seemed to stare straight into his lies. It reminded him of…

“Spare me the riddles.” Izaya sighed as he dropped the polite act. It seemed the young man knew him. Or thought he knew him.

“Tea? Or would you rather I get you a warm towel?” Izaya changed the topic as he walked over to the kitchen. He grabbed a kitchen towel and poured warm water from the sink to soak it. He handed it to his guest.

“And what brings you here…sir? If you know the Black Rider, I take it you’re far familiar with the darker alleys than your appearance seem to give off.” Izaya crouched on the floor near the door where the young man had collapsed. He wore a plain white button down and black pants. He really smelled badly as if he was thrown into a dumpster recently. The man took the towel and held it blankly for a bit, not knowing what he was suppose to do with it before he rubbed the towel between his hands. Izaya had hoped he would wash up his face but...  
  
“Really Orihara. I thought you were more sensitive to what happens in this city.” There was disappointment in his voice, Izaya noticed this, and that irked him.

“Perhaps a name would be nice?” Izaya tried instead. Was this guy one of the men he swindled when he was in his female online persona, Kanra? No, he was much too young looking. Perhaps he was a young yakuza affiliated with the top brass if he knew to go to Celty to find him?

“Really disappointed in you, Orihara.” He shook his head and Izaya’s eyebrow twitched.

“Tsukumoya Shinichi, you come to my chat often enough when you are stuck getting information.” There was that mysterious smile on his lips as the young man who called himself Tsukumoya smirked right back at the stunned informant.

“Didn’t think I’d finally meet you.” Izaya blinked. “Then who’s managing the chat if you’re here right now. Doesn’t it have to be online 24/7?”  
  
“No one. The server is down…considering I _am_ the server. Besides, we have ‘met’. At least to ‘me’, chatting in the room was the closest to ‘meeting’ you would have gotten.” Tsukumoya struggled to stand up but fell back down. This time, Izaya did grab him so he doesn’t hurt himself.

“Steady. And I meant I’m surprised to meet you in person.” Izaya helped him up. Whatever had happened, it had left Tsukumoya very weak. Sitting on the floor wasn’t helping, Izaya decided the least he could do was take him to the bathroom and let him wash up. If this really was Tsukumoya, it certainly explained how he knew Celty.

“It wouldn’t have been possible before. Like I said, I ‘am’ the chatroom. I didn’t have a physical body before.”

“Come again?” Izaya frowned.

“You either have a hard time comprehending phenomenons despite knowing Saika and Dullahan…or you have a bad hearing. Of course, I’m inclined to believe the best of you.”

“Very funny, Tsukumoya.” Izaya rolled his eyes as he helped the man to the stairs. Already they were getting back to their usual banter.  “So you’re saying that you never had a physical body…then what, you were an esper?”

“What is it with you humans and espers? Let’s say I simply did not have a physical body and I was connections of synapses that could surf through the internet at ease.”

“Huh…” Izaya struggled as Tsukumoya barely stepped up the stairs. This man…it was as if he didn’t know how to walk. Actually...if the stories were true, he probably didn’t know how to walk at all.  “So, how did you become human?”

“Santa Claus came by to give out gifts. Apparently I was especially good this year.”

“Who?!” Izaya paused as he looked back down at the silver haired man incredulously.

“Santa Claus. Saint Nicholas, however you guys name him.”

“He’s real?!”

“You’ve met a dullahan, a cursed sword and a vampire but you’re still unwilling to believe in Santa Claus? He’s real like you and me. Of course, I’m not surprised he had put you in his naughty list so you probably never met him.” There it was again, that smug smirk that irritated Izaya from hell and back again.

“Okay, fine. So Santa is real. Whoop-de-doo. Now what?” Izaya looked back at Tsukumoya with irritation when the young man stopped walking up the stairs suddenly.

“Erm…Orihara?” There was a mixture of panic and nervousness in that question that made Izaya pause from being sarcastic.

“Yeah?” Izaya asked slowly.

“It’s that umm…weird bodily sensation I’m having again.”  
  
“What weird sensation?”

“Like when your bowel movements suddenly churn and…how do you hold in your liquid from being discharged between your legs?”

Izaya let out a scream that sounded like a high-pitched bat as he grabbed Tsukumoya and carried him awkwardly and hurriedly up the stairs. Tsukumoya’s new body was that of a grown man and he was heavy but the idea of his beautiful clean floors being stained with piss made Izaya scramble toward the bathroom with more ardent passion than before.

Izaya was able to almost throw the young man into his tub just in time as Tsukumoya tinkled between his legs. If anything, now the informant knew what smell he must have been smelling all along.

“Take it off. All of it!” Izaya huffed as he tugged at Tsukumoya’s shirts and soiled pants. “You don’t even know how to hold in your pee?!”

“Well, I’ve never been a human before…don’t baby humans pee in their diapers?”

“That’s not the point!!” Izaya tugged at the shirt a bit more roughly. Tsukumoya only chuckled but then he frowned.

“Really, how do you guys live like this? I can feel all sorts of imbalance of chemistry swirling in my body. Is this what you call...anxiety?”

  
“Oh shut up, I don’t care. You can’t pay me enough to babysit you or potty train you. Figure it out yourself.”

“No wonder you humans always make illogical decisions. All this baggage called emotions...it’s as if your machine is continuously malfunctioning every few minutes. There’s new feeling and sensation with each and every-”

“Oh shut up. Pants. Now. I’m washing all of this.” Izaya tugged off the pants and cringed as he folded the wet clothing.

“Please tell me you had looked up how humans wash through videos online…”  
  
“I have.” Tsukumoya confirmed with a short nod as if he was taking in a new assignment. Izaya groaned.

“Good. Then wash. I’m gonna wash these…” Izaya sighed as he closed the door behind him with the mess. He himself probably need a good wash as well….but for now he threw everything into the laundry machine, including his own clothes he was wearing and wiped himself in the chest the best he could with a wet towel. After wearing fresh set of clothes, he went ahead and wiped down the floors that Tsukumoya had been, desensitizing it the best he could. The rest, Namie could handle it when she came back.

It was almost forty minutes when Izaya had finished cleaning up and came back upstairs to check up on Tsukumoya…only to see that near the door there were foam bubbles leaking out!

“TSUKUMOYAAA!!!!!!!!!!!” Izaya screamed in exasperation as he burst open the door. And sure enough, there were soap bubbles everywhere! The water was still pouring into the tub, overflowing as Tsukumoya was squeezing a bottle of liquid soap into the tub.

“Ah, welcome back, Oriha-”

“DON’T WELCOME BACK ME!!!!” Izaya slooshed through the bubbles coming to his knee to turn off the faucet and uncork the tub. “What the hell are you doing?!”

“Cleaning.” Tsukumoya answered calmly. Izaya wanted to bash his head against the wall.

“Never mind, don’t do anything.” Izaya waded out and grabbed fresh towels. He rolled up his sleeves and started cleaning the floor near the entrance the best he could and waited for the bubbles to calm down.

“Seriously, can’t you do anything properly?” Izaya sighed as he was cleaning.

“Guess not. I think Sturluson-san was exasperated too. And I suppose Heiwajima.” Tsukumoya spoke calmly in a matter-of-fact way but there was a small tone of sadness mixed with the voice.

“Heiwajima? You mean Shizuo?” Izaya looked up in the middle of wiping the floor with another fresh towel.

“You weren’t the first one to find me in my human state.” Tsukumoya shrugged. Though there was nothing that indicated through his body motion, somehow Izaya felt that his eyes looked a bit discouraged or perhaps a bit ashamed.

“Why don’t you start from the beginning?” Izaya wrung the towel in the sink and started to wipe down a bit more.

“Mmmm… So Saint Nick came by and said I’ve been pretty good this year. It seems that Celty gets visits time to time too but he can’t give her her number one wish list…as he can’t ‘steal’ back the head once it’s in someone’s possession. Saint Nick can create things or even find something lost but since the head was purchased and was someone’s property he-”

“Okay, okay I got it. I’m asking about your story.”

“Right, so it was my turn. I never really wanted anything before so I thought about it. Then I asked if he could turn me into a human for just one day.”

“So this is temporary?” Izaya looked almost relieved as he finished cleaning most of the soap bubbles that had spilled to the floor.

“Twenty four hours to be exact.” Tsukumoya gave him a nod.

“It’s already 11:30pm.” Izaya blinked. Then his eyes widen. “You only have thirty more minutes then? Wait, what exactly did you do all day?”

“Well, first it was really nice having a human body and I really enjoyed walking around Ikebukuro. I can understand why you enjoy the people watching and…” Tsukumoya paused when Izaya gave him that impatient look. He smiled. “But I got really hungry. I didn’t realize why my stomach was growling and why I felt fatigued but eventually I walked by Russia Sushi and the scent hit my nose. My, I now understand why you humans go through lengths just to recharge three times a day.”

“Go on~” Izaya beckoned as he now corked the tub again and turned on the shower head, testing the warm water before pouring it directly onto the back of Tsukumoya.

“My problem was, I didn’t have money. Sure I have money in my bank but I had no proof of identification to access it.”

Izaya sighed. “This Santa is pretty stupid if he didn’t give you a wallet.”  
  
“He probably didn’t think it through. He only eats cookies and milk once a year after all.” Tsukumoya shrugged. Izaya rolled his eyes.

“And then?”

“Well, now that I realize I was hungry, I needed to ask if someone could spare me some change. And in return, I can either provide them information or promise to pay them back the next day.”

Izaya groaned, “This already sounds like a bad movie.”

“Well, a few humans laughed and didn’t believe me…then in order to prove that I’m not lying, I would tell them their information. Their name, date of birth, social security number, what they secretly do at night or what they ate yesterday all the way to the their bank account number and credit card number which they themselves couldn’t memorize but when they check their wallet, they would realize I’m right…”

“...Oi, oi. That sounds dangerous…” Izaya paused from washing Tsukumoya’s soft hair. “Didn’t you get into trouble for that?”

“I was just trying to earn their trust...of course it frightened them more than gaining their trust.”

“Obviously.” Izaya scoffed.

“Then someone called the police saying I’m a stalker…” Tsukumoya’s expression soured at that.

“Not surprising.”

“While I was running, I accidentally tugged down a woman’s shirt and fell on her…” Tsukumoya squirmed embarrassed. “Apparently the police started screaming about adding more charges.”  Izaya sighed in exasperation.

“Still, I think Chikage-san was uncalled for.”

“Chikage?”

“Yeah, he intervened when I fell on the woman. While trying to avoid his punches, I accidentally bumped Heiwajima’s arm and spilled his drink on his clothes.”

“Shizu-chan?!”

“It wasn’t as bad until I was trying to avoid a vending machine being thrown at me...and really, it wasn’t _my_ fault that one of them hit the itasha side of Togusa-san’s vehicle right?”

“You hit his CAR?!”

“No, no. Not me. The raining vending machines. But then the door got crushed in and their piles of books fell to the dirty puddle…”

“Oh Karisawa and Yumasaki’s collection…” Izaya groaned.

“Apparently, I ruined some of their treasured stash.  And seriously, how was I supposed to know that they were also carrying the only limited copy of Hijiribe Ruri’s signed album? I think even Shiki-san wanted to throw me in front of Heiwajima at that point.”

“Shiki-san was there too?!” Izaya’s eyes bulged.

“Yeah, they were all going to Ruri’s Christmas Eve concert. Really Orihara, you really should keep up with the pop culture of this city.”

“Don’t be chastising me when it’s you who got into all that mess!” Izaya snapped but he groaned and rubbed his temple.

“...and? Did you at least eat?”

“Y-Yeah…. Sturluson-san happened by and helped me escape because she felt that I wasn’t a normal human. Apparently I give off the same feel as a fairy. She eventually took me to eat at Russia Sushi and I promised to pay her back.” Tsukumoya closed his eyes. “Boy, I can see why you liked ootoro. It did taste heavenly.”

When Tsukumoya slowly opened his eyes again, Izaya noted then why he had thought his eyes looked mysterious and piercing. Now all the dirt was gone from his face and hair, he had a lovely porcelain skin, almost white with silver long hair, almost like an elf. And his eyes were pale gold, an unusual color at that. And the pupil seemed to enlarge and narrow depending on his mood almost like that of a cat…or possibly a small reptile. Interesting…

Izaya poured shampoo into Tsukumoya’s silky hair and carefully rinsed it off one more time.

“And? Then what happened? I take it there was a reason why Celty brought you here?”

“Well I did want to see you before I changed back but…I realized after I ate, I didn’t know…how to hold in my…bodily fluids…” Tsukumoya blushed. “I’m sure I was a pain to both Simon and Dennis…and to Sturluson-san. I need to pay them back in some way. And then I got into another trouble with Heiwajima…I figured I was just safer if I was with you.”

“So, Celty dumped you here since she didn’t want to babysit you anymore?” Izaya raised his eyebrow.

“That and I’m sure she didn’t want to miss the holiday special Ruri was hosting around midnight. It should be on TV right now. I believe both Ruri Hijiribe and Hanejima Yuuhei are hosting the show as they light up that big Christmas tree downtown.”

“Oh…that. I see.”

“Your sisters are there too you know.”

“I remember them saying something about that yeah.” Izaya poured the water to rinse off the shampoo completely. With that long silver hair and that thin pale albino skin...Tsukumoya looked like a girl, almost. Once it’s clean, Izaya fingers through the hair almost absentmindedly, watching it fall between his fingertips. He almost wanted to braid them like he used to braid Mairu’s hair.

“I-Izaya?”

Izaya paused from playing with Tsukumoya’s hair to look over. Tsukumoya rarely called him by his first name as he pretended to keep their relationship as professional as possible. But whenever Tsukumoya did slip, it was usually important, or something Tsukumoya needed to say in a hurry to get his attention.

“Yeah?”

“Is...that suppose to happen?”

Izaya looked down at where Tsukumoya was pointing at, between his legs. The informant couldn’t help but smirk.

“It’s natural. Are you nervous?” Izaya slid his hands down Tsukumoya’s hips almost sensually, gliding closer toward the small erection bobbing up and down the surface of the bathtub’s water. It looked hesitant, as if it didn’t know what to do, just like the master himself as Tsukumoya also looked bewildered.

“I have read up on the phenomenon but I don’t exactly feel any different. Isn’t it what you humans call ‘being turned on’ supposed to make one feel hot and bothered?”

Izaya couldn’t help but chuckle as one hand teasingly slipped under the water. He felt Tsukumoya shiver against him.

“Now _that_ is when you are ‘turned on.’ Earlier could be from anything.” Izaya slowly pumped the erection under the water as they both watched the erection grow harder with the raven’s careful administration. “Humans could get erection from anything really. Sometimes when you have to go use the bathroom really badly...all the way to just having their penis being rubbed roughly against a fabric. Or when they’re just a bit too relaxed in their sleep…” Izaya gripped the cock tighter and continued to stroke as Tsukumoya let out a small gasp.

“Then…what I’m feeling right now is…?” Tsukumoya’s cheeks were turning into a shade of pink and Izaya was pretty sure it wasn’t from the warm steam of the bathroom.

“Did you really need to ask?” Izaya used one hand to turn Tsukumoya’s  chin toward him. He leaned his lips closer, licking his own to wet them. It wasn’t that Izaya had found Tsukumoya rather attractive in this human state, or that Izaya particularly liked sex in general. No, it was the fact that Tsukumoya was in such a vulnerable state and the informant was pretty sure he’d never have another chance to use this to his advantage and show Shinichi once and for all who ‘tops’ in this relationship, settling a score between their ongoing banter in the chatrooms. “I’ll help you this once.”

With that Izay locked his lips with Shinichi’s and they both moaned softly. Tsukumoya’s head was spinning, he felt suddenly dizzy with swirls of emotions and sensations he couldn’t compute. Izaya licked his soft tongue and deepened the kiss while his hand was busily pumping the cock. Everything was such a new sensation to the once astral being that he could not comprehend at all what was going on.

“Haaah…aaah…! Izaya….! It…it feels weird…”

“Just weird? Not…good?” Izaya tried again, this time both of his hands stroking that poor confused cock while his tongue battled for dominance inside Tsukumoya’s mouth. Shinichi moaned, reeling as he could feel the head of his cock being rubbed just right along with his testes being rolled.

“I...Izaya?” Tsukumoya gasped when one of Izaya’s hand left him to grab his wrist and pull it to his cock.

“Go on. Touch it. It’ll feel good.” Izaya wrapped his hand over Tsukumoya’s and helped him touch himself. Tsukumoya was amazed at the feeling of the skin fold around his penis and how it made him jolt in several places in his body.

“It…it feels weird…” Tsukumoya shivered as Izaya’s other hand now twirled his nipple, making it hard before tugging at it hard. He yelped at the sudden tug and whimpered.

“Not weird…it feels good doesn’t it?”

“Aaah...aaahnn...aaaahhh!!!” Tsukumoya’s moans grew louder and louder as Izaya now pinched his nipple and started to stroke his length at a faster pace, the water splashing everywhere. Tsukumoya wanted to lift his hips upward and he didn’t understand why nor did he understand why he curled his toes and his legs felt weak.

“I-Izaya…! I…!!” Tsukumoya yelped as something burst forth, his mind blanked out and pleasure flooding his system. He shuddered as jets of sticky cum shot out in strings and his entire body was wracked with intense pleasure. He had never felt such orgasm before not even when he had figured out a way to hack into the national security system and dug out the true numbers to Japan’s national debt. The ecstasy was incomparable and incomprehensible to the astral being that had never felt such bodily pleasure.

“I...Izaya?” Tsukumoya blinked open his eyes to look up at his rival informant.

“Not bad, I take it?” Izaya smiled softly and winked.

“That...was rather incredible.” Tsukumoya nodded as he slumped back into Izaya’s arms. They stayed like so for awhile as the water around them cooled.

“Hey...Izaya?”

“?” Izaya wondered if they should get out of the tub and get cleaned up when he felt it too. The weight of Tsukumoya leaning on him was lessening. Or rather, the physical body he had seemed to feel less solid and more translucent.

‘Ah… must be midnight…’ Izaya thought to himself.

Tsukumoya turned to face him, his pale golden eyes suddenly locking onto Izaya’s crimson orbs.

“Tsukumoya?”

“Izaya. I…”

But before Tsukumoya could finish his sentence, his body faded away as if he was just a mist.

Izaya stared into the empty space in front of him and tried to take it all in. It really happened right? It wasn’t something he had dreamed? And what was it that Tsukumoya wanted to say? The timing was perfect...the atmosphere was right. He couldn’t have…meant to confess, did he? It was ridiculous thought but...

The informant gave a long sigh and cleaned himself up. He took his time to dry his hair and got into his pajamas. Then he sat in front of his computer and got onto Tsukumoya’s twenty-four hour chat as if nothing was amiss.

 

_Orihara Izaya, reborn!_

_Orihara Izaya_

Hey Tsukumoya. Are you there?

 

_Tsukumoya Shinichi_

Good to see you’re back.

 

_Orihara Izaya_

So were you really at my place just now?

 

_Tsukumoya Shinichi_

Why?  Did you think it was a dream?

 

_Orihara Izaya_

So I take it Santa Claus was real and Cinderella had to go back home, I take it?

 

_Tsukumoya Shinichi_

Haha, very funny Orihara.

 

_Orihara Izaya_

.

 

_Orihara Izaya_

.

 

_Orihara Izaya_

Say…what was it that you were going to ask me?

_Tsukumoya Shinichi_

Ah yes. So I was going to ask, I rather enjoyed our experience together. And I think if I’m in a good behavior, Santa should come back again. I wanted to ask if I could be a human for a year and be your roommate. Of course, I’d pay you upfront and I promise to be toilet trained but I think the profit would be rather handsome if you…

 

_Orihara Izaya_

Absolutely NOT!

 

_ORIHARA IZAYA, confirmed dead!_

 

_Tsukumoya Shinichi_

Ah…you’re such a tsuntsun, Orihara.

  


\--the end ♥

  



End file.
